I'AM BAAAAACK!!!!!!!

Well all you scumbags, DA Jackhammer is back on the block… aaah it's nice to be back in the old neighborhood, I see nothings changed while I was away… Big Johnny T is still in front of the mirror making sure his hair is juuuuust right, with the smell bacon on the frying pan looming from the kitchen… And I see you have met our brother in arms Randy “One Eyed” Tucker. I love ya Randy and thanks for stepping out of the shadows and filling in for DA JACK will I was healing over a leg injury that I sustained while rescuing the Hawaiian Tropic Bikini Team from an overturned tour bus in Bakersfield, CA… a bus that was engulfed by flames that I came across on my way back to LA from Las Vegas.

Lucky for the Jack, the women of Hawaiian Tropic were so grateful for my heroic act of running through the flames into the bus and carrying each one of the 22 members on board the bus that unfaithful day to safety, that they each took time from their busy tour to take turns to heal good old Jack back to health. Mind you, I am stuck suffering from my injuries…ummmm…injury, but after many conversations and much advice from Johnny T. he felt it would be best for not only for my spirits but all those followers, who live and die by the words of Team Tahoe that I make an early return to the neighborhood. So here I am.

So I am not going to try to play catch up… Yes Clerks 2 is funny as hell, Yes, Family Jewels is the best damn show on TV since the Howard Stern Show and Yes, I still pack a 12 and half inch rod in my pants… the half inch is for luck… we all know this… So on the night of my return I would like to talk quickly about this past Sunday’s PPV WWE’s SummerSlam.

Much to MY surprise SummerSlam was not the party of the summer it was planned out to be. It was a bit on the boring side… think I even fall asleep at one point, that’s of course until Brother Randy hopped on the computer and showed Jack some interesting pictures of Miss Mickie James pre WWE… and if you can find them, they’re actually not bad. Well back to SummerSlam... although I felt that the PPV fell a little flat, the match of the night would have to go the Flair vs. Foley match. Not only was it a good match but one of the bloodiest in recent time… it’s always good to see Foley pull out his bag of thumbtacks… and of course how can we have a PPV without Flair’s forehead cut open turning his blonde hair into a bloody soaked set of hair. Beau-ti-ful… And not only did we see Foley cut to the point of requiring 25 stitches but we saw Flair take his game to a whole new level of violence…the man threatened to kill two people on live T.V… Yes folks for a man as old enough to have witnessed Moses part the Red Sea, he can still whip out the “Bitch be good!!” stick and give one hell of a show…

JACKHAMMER OUUUUUUT!!!!

It Never Ends Does It?

So due to unforseen injuries brought on by a softball game this past Sunday, fellow brother Randy Tucker will be out of commission temporarily. While this injury may seem life altering depending on how things go, Mr. Tucker has made us aware that he is doing well and in not very much pain. Lets all hope for a very speedy recovery and with that being said, we all know that Mr. Tucker will indeed remain Perfect through these times... Nothing ever seems to change that somehow... Go figure.

Not too much to report on at this very moment other than to keep the Randy one in your thoughts as I am sure you were just feeling comfortable... it won't be long before he returns and turns your life and way of thinking into a new direction.


Oh... just thought of something... Gene Simmons Family Jewels... watch it Monday nights... Will report more on this later. The two brand new episodes last night were great. Still hate the guy from time to time (reason why later...) but the show is worth watching. If not because you are a Kiss fan but because Shannon Tweed is one sweet lookin' mama. Come on everyone as Jeff The Drunk would say.... Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice!

TAHOE Out!

Drawing a Blank Today...

I gotta admit kids... I need to make that Simpson picture into a poster or somethin' because it would be a waste otherwise. Ya gotta wonder if she'd get upset if you saw her and asked her to sign it. Hahaha

Aside from all that, another great day in here in beautiful Salt Lake. Don't you find it odd how MTV is celebrating its 25th anniversary and all and if you recall, their first video played on the station so many moons ago was by the Buggles - Video Killed the Radio Star... yet wouldn't you have to say the MTV Killed the Video Star? Just a thought because I mean really... how much music is actually played on that station? The same goes for vH1. Now I am not knocking the great reality shows on vH1 because I find myself watching most of them but geez.... lets hope there is never a day when the Fuse network starts doing the same...

So I have been paying attention to the news a bit lately mainly because their have been some very interesting cases as of late. The Yates case where Andrea Yates drowned her children in a bathtub and for some odd reason wasn't found guilty yet she was found insane. Come on people... anyone who commits murder especially on children of any kind ain't right in the head. Then out here in Utah we had a young girl abducted by a neighbor and killed. This guy actually confessed that he had been planning it all along. So then I read in the paper today that a father beat his 10 year old daughter to death. His response? "I lost control". Holy crap people. I know myself, Jackhammer, and Mr. Tucker were all raised fairly the same and got our spankings by belt or switch but good god.... Way too many crimes against children these. Now I can almost guarantee that the father that beat his child to death will be found guilty yet from what I understand, the case does not somehow qualify for the death penalty. The guy who abducted the 5 yr old here in Utah will be found guilty. So how did Andrea Yates get off? Post partum depression.

Gotta love our Judicial system folks....

Tahoe OUT!

Yum Yum Gimme Some!

So besides my true feelings that I feel that Jessica Simpson is the antichrist, this new pic shot of her two nights ago leaving the Ivy, I gotta say... lookin' HOT!

Go ahead my children and click the image for a closer view. You won't be disappointed. Your Uncle Johnny sure wasn't. So yes I am always on the look for great and super hot photos like the one above.

So we had our intro post from Brother Tucker earlier today and well like he said, just be ready for when he really has something to say. Now I have know my fellow brother for many a moon and well I can dig what he says... but it may take all of you a bit of time to adjust... He's the kind of kat that ya love to hate but end up hatin' to love if you know what I mean.

So back to Jessica's picture. Holy crap its hot. I tell ya... it's about time we see what her creepy pop has been talkin' about for some time... Now I am know why he brings them twins up... is it gettin' hot in this mutha or what?

Tahoe OUT!

A Silent Partner Comes Out of Hiding...

So due to unforseen health issues brought on by a very rough quarterly meeting in CA recently, fellow brother DA Jackhammer will be out of commission temporarily. So to keep the ball rolling so to speak here, one of our silent partners has decided to come foward and bring forth true greatness like only yours truly could bring to the masses.

Without any further lost time, I bring forth the one... the only... Randy Tucker. (Kick start the OG NWO Theme)

Be scared... be very scared...